Showing posts with label dreams. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dreams. Show all posts

Saturday, March 27, 2010

I Dream in Scottish


I dream in Scottish, of life in a place like this:
And in those dreams is a guy who looks remarkably like this:
married to a girl who shares my name; we're both called this, 
Which, not surprisingly, he likes to pretend is short for this: 
On Fridays, they meet here with friends
for a pint and some craic:
and open their door to the world on Saturday nights, 
so girls get a chance to wear pretty dresses like this:
and plait their hair prettily, like this:

and so the men have a chance 
to chat up pretty birds like this:
This is one party where Gaga pays due deference to pipes,
yet these high heeled monsters 
still manage to make a dance floor. 
Only to meet up later in hallways to giggle
Or gather handsomely in the kitchen to laugh by his side,

While she sneaks off to carry out naughty capers 
while no one is looking (except for Flossie):

Oh, what dreams may come.
How lucky I am, to spend my nights 
honoring friendships, like this:
And throwing shameless parties as
 excuses to celebrate families like this:
While partnering in love the same as I do in real life.
May that love age in both life 
and dreams and grow this distinguished
while staying forever fresh
and never losing its sense of humor.
In hopes that someday we may live in life 
where we do in my dreams:



Alba Gu Bra

Friday, February 19, 2010

Make 'em Last


Petra, Jordan
where everyone should go

How is it possible that this thing
has been carved out of the earth 
and that it has not been destroyed...answer me that. 
I think it is magic. 

 Cornwall, England
 where ancient kings rest

Can you imagine a better place for 
your earthly remains to lie eternal?
Is there a place more transcendent 
for loved ones to visit and find comfort 
in the swell of peace than here?
 

Thursday, February 11, 2010

To Go or Stay




Deciding to return home from Turkey was difficult. We found ourselves in a tight spot.

The land of lojman was so full for our son. He had the life: ten friends at his whim 24 hours a day. School with those friends and play and play and play with those friends. He went slip and sliding and played soccer with them. He met them at the park and went to picnics with them. He took vacations with them and went grocery shopping with them.

He also had a wonderful school there where he was taught in Turkish and English and went to school with all of his friends all day long. He learned through play and was truly loved, as each child was in this tight knit community.

All the things that made us feel we were in the film Ground Hog's Day, those things were what made lojmanlar just perfect for a 3 yr old boy. He felt safe and loved and had all the socializing he needed. It was hard to take him away from that.

Now he is experiencing new and different things each day and being exposed to things outside of my control and I love it. I love the excitement it brings and the way it helps him grow and develop, but I often wonder what one more year in Istanbul, in lojmanlar, would have brought for him. I wonder whether he would have continued to love it and whether he would have been able to develop more socially and academically had he stayed in the sweet space of his life with his friends. That time was so special for him.

He remembers, sometimes verbally, the kids he used to know and the things he used to do there. He remembers the laughter and playing and the security of being on a campus and "owning" the area he lived in and really knowing every nook and cranny.

But I love the person he is learning to be in this space we have brought him to where he can really grow. I think if we had stayed it would have been harder for him to leave after 3 years and understand what was happening. I think he knows that this is the place for him, and I hope it is the best choice for all of us.

It is hard to know what is best at any given time, but when we were deciding whether or not we should return I said, NJ is the place we need to be. I have yet to discover why that is, but I am glad I don't have to figure it out if I just know that it is.

I think everyone grows in different places. The labels attached to our trunks said: need snow, a touch of direct sunlight, old friends, deep roots, and variety.

...so I think this is where we grow best.

Thursday, February 4, 2010

Title IX

Dear Tomboys of the 60's,

Hi there. I am a girl who was a tomboy and played and played and played every sport that involved a sphere. I consider myself a tomboy of the 90s, but I am not sure that term was ever put on me. I don't remember hearing it, and I think it is because of this thing called Title IX, whatever it is. I was just an athletic girl, and sometimes even just an athlete.

Climbing in trees and jumping over fences, what a great way to use your energy. Thank you for being tomboys even though no one gave you sports to play. Making bruises and scars cool must have been hard when there was no goal posts in sight. Female athletes owe you all for the healthy, exercise filled lives we live today.

But we owe you more than that, don't we. Legitimizing women's sports has been a struggle and not having sports to legitimize must have been devastating. I can't imagine not doing something you knew you had a talent for, a desire for. Or being told you can't or aren't good enough to do something you know you can do. Was that second part worse? I would think it would be worse.

I look around at many of my friends and many of the things I love about my life and they have so much to do with sports and athletics and there is no way those things would have existed without you. You tomboys, breaking through the powder being puffed onto cheeks, you are the ones I have to thank.

Thank you for my strong back to pick up and carry my children. Thank you for my determination to do better and to be better. Thank you for knowing how to work with others as a team. Thank you mostly for showing me how to live a healthy life, one where staying fit is fun.

Thank you tomboys, I owe you my life.

Love,
Celine

Sunday, January 31, 2010

I have a dream...

we think we are so funny, but isn't that all that matters?
67 has never looked so good

The Miss America pageant is making me question my dreams. Fifty-three well versed, well groomed and stylized women keep saying that it was their dream, their one goal in life to become Miss America. Although I am having trouble finding virtue in that. It must be virtuous though - they all look so sweet.

My dad celebrated his 67th birthday yesterday. I like to think he has accomplished many of his goals. I never asked him what they were, but, being his self-centered off-spring, I like to think our production was one of his ultimate goals. Last night, 4 of his children sat around his table and with complete ease filled 4 hours of time with words and laughter. I think this is one of my goals. Can I get my kids to really love having face time with each other?

This is what we do.

I am not good at learning lessons, but I think that I have learned that we should hope our dreams change. That the ultimate dream should never actually happen because if it does, then what? If we aren't always learning something, then what are we doing?

Watching the news on Haiti the other day I was almost in tears.

I wasn't in tears when people were pulled from the rubble (that produced gasps of astonishment and lots of denial - I try to imagine that catastrophes like that are impossible, and I try my best to disconnect and continue on with my life here), but I cried when an elderly volunteer doctor said:

"Being here is a life changing experience...a life changing experience...even if I don't have a lot left." I sensed the absolute truth in that statement when he said it. Why shouldn't we have life changing experiences at any moment in our lives?

(I know - too many questions in one post and the connections are really loose...I am getting there).

Dreams are like creative muses. They are not things we create or control like we might think. We have to stay open to them in order to really capture their essence, but not being ready for them is okay. In time, another will present itself and we will surely be ready. Watching author Lizzie Gilbert give
this lecture really clarified that feeling I had when the doctor spoke and the feeling I had during the four hour chat last night.

So Miss Americas, if this dream skips over you, hold on to those beautifully styled dresses and chicken cutlet inserts and butt glue because there will be other dreams coming your way and you will need that stuff.